A bridal shower can be a hilarious, fun, memorable experience for everyone involved! Most importantly, it lends a HUGE opportunity to talk about something that's been so hush hush and taboo for so long - sex!
Within marriage, sex is actually something that you CAN talk about and dare I say - enjoy. Part of the problem is.... we don't talk about it! We talk about finances, family, parenting, travel plans, life goals and dreams, even what favorite foods are, but when it comes to sex and what a future husband/wife are interested in, there's usually little to no communication. When everything else in that list in the sentence prior to this involves communication, any and everything involving sex has very little communication.
What better place to begin having those conversations (assuming you haven't had them yet with the bride to be) at her bridal shower? Here's some great gift ideas that can be fun, but also educational and helpful for the bride and her future intimacy life with her husband. You'll find some books as well as toys and a class that have been very helpful in the sex AND marriage community!
*Disclaimer* I don't earn any commission for any of the links below. I also don't claim to be a therapist or counselor of any kind. These are just resources that our team has found to be helpful and by sharing them, I hope they help you in you and your friends' journeys of intimacy, sex, life, and love.
1. Lingerie -
This is always a great jump-off point if you don't know to get for your friend. You know the personality of the bride and we here at JSeboudoir believe that fashion (and yes that includes lingerie) can be an expression of your personality. In this case, encourage the bride to express herself in the privacy of her bedroom with some lingerie. Give the gift of a beautiful satin slip, form-fitting bodysuit, or sensual bustier for the bride to be. If you are thinking ahead and what something that can work for a boudoir shoot, a bodysuit ALWAYS translates well into images. I'd highly recommend that.
Why this is a good gift: Simple for you, a common (though still awesome) gift that you can help the bride express herself in the bedroom.
A great book for BOTH the bride and groom to go through together. From a Christian perspective, it discusses the "Crazy Cycle" that a married couple (or any couple for that matter) can get into, as well as how to get out of it and what's needed in order to get on the "Energizing Cycle". The Crazy Cycle is when the husband refuses to show love to his wife, and the wife disrespects her husband.
To go a little deeper, this hinges upon a specific Bible verse that commands to love their wives, and wives to respect their husbands. You may have heard in Christian circles that the wife is to "submit to the husband", but they leave another critical component out. The Bible also challenges the husband to die to his own desires and love his wife before loving himself. When you have a husband and wife you willingly give first to each other, it can only spell beautiful intimacy! It was life-changing for my wife and myself in our own marriage journey!
Why this is a good gift: sexual intimacy and connection will stall if a husband and wife aren't in sync with each other emotionally. The books listed below won't matter if they keep entering repeated fights and constant issues.
In the Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex, author Sheila Wray Gregoire helps women see how sexual intimacy was designed to be physically stupendous but also incredibly intimate. She surveyed over 2,000 people and she also includes lots of voices from other "Good Girls", giving insight into how other women have learned to truly enjoy sex in marriage.
Whether you're about to walk down the aisle or you've been married for decades, The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex will lead you on a wonderful journey of discovery towards the amazing sex life God designed you for.
With humor, research, and lots of anecdotes, author Sheila Wray Gregoire helps women see how our culture's version of sex, which concentrates on the physical above all else, makes sex shallow. God, on the other hand, intended sex to unite us physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Gregoire walks through these three aspects of sex, showing how to make each amazing, and how to overcome the roadblocks in each area we often encounter.
Why this is a good gift: It can help the bride break preconceptions/misunderstandings that she may have picked up and learned throughout the course of her life. Those misunderstandings can cause major friction (in combination with the groom's misunderstandings) once you put the groom and bride together.
Another great book from Sheila, this book expands on the topics above. If the bride to be is a Christian, this can be very helpful for her. Sheila uses her experience as a Christian sex blogger to discuss the evangelical church's unbiblical teachings about sex and sexuality. As a result, it has damaged women's views and experience of sex and shows how a true biblical understanding of sex can free them-AND their husbands-to experience the kind of intimacy and wholeness God intends.
Why this is a good gift: It can help BOTH the bride and groom challenge the thoughts they may have picked up in their church as well as from their parents. Although it does have a Christian perspective, it can still offer another viewpoint that can be very helpful.
This is a recommendation from Sex Expert Samia Burton down below. She offers SEVERAL courses on the female anatomy as well as courses on improving your sexual fulfillment. Why is this important, you ask? This is from her page and she says it better than I could, "So many of us have an idea of what we want but we have no idea how to give it, describe it, learn it or find it! Let’s simply start with the truth: It is not your fault that you have not been properly educated on how to find pleasure by yourself or with another." Another quote from her is, "It is however your responsibility to acknowledge that you have not studied pleasure & that yourself & the partners of your choice deserve a fighting chance to create pleasure in ways that you had no idea were even imaginable."
This instantly downloadable PDF contains 60 sexual activities that you can pick and choose from to create an adult version of the classic memory game with a twist: you have to do the activities on the sets you pick up.
This game is perfect for those couples looking to add some excitement into their sessions by shaking up the order of events, by extending foreplay, or simply by not being responsible for choosing the next activity.
We couldn't end this list without telling you to encourage your bridge to get a luxury boudoir photo session done! It's a GREAT way she can celebrate her sexiness, capture this moment in time before she starts a new chapter of her life, can be given as a gift to her husband the day of the wedding, and can be a VERY meaningful photo album the bride can look back on in 5, 10, 15 years. She can even show it to her future daughters as to what the celebration of healthy sexuality and confidence looks like.
If you have any other ideas, share them below!
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